nut hugger
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
