She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
