I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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