Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
