so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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