Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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