I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I got inside last night via doggy door
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
