do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize