i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
