your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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