i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
