i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
My bed smells like the plague
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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