Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
