Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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