Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
