i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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