Sponge bath it is.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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