no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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