I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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