Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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