In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
