he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Randomize
