My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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