He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
