You just made me feel so damn special
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
