do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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