I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
