Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
