just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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