I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
