If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
