Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
