chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
