official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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