Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
