I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
