was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize