So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
