seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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