Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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