UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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