Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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