Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
