We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
