We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
