it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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