dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
