He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
drinking out of a sandbucket again
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
