Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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