I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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